All over the place...

Today was really quite bad and kind of good all in one big package. Which made it all kind of exhausting. Here's some info:

• SPAMALOT was wonderful! I'm not even a Monty Python nerd like my sister and I quite liked it. It seems a little strange to laugh at fart jokes, watch a glittery dance number and then laugh at boob jokes. What a good show though, if you have the time and money, go see it while its still available in Chicago. Its going to be a huge hit on Broadway. You'll regret it...
• After seeing SPAMALOT I got home quite late and even after a fun night I still ended up tired and crabby this morning.
• I got the info on my raise/bonus (who knew there would be a bonus?? Yay for me!) and it was much better than i expected. I guess after hearing the bitters complain about how cheap my employer is (and my dad has said it too) I imagined they would try to cheese me. You know, well, we're giving you a 5% raise. Which would include cost of living and really not be a raise at all. But no, I'm happy with my raise. Plus, I am promoted. So its all up from here.
• Insurance, especially health insurance can kiss my ass! Well, really only Humana. I hate them. On the positive for health insurance, United actually paid for my whole allergist appointment! We'll see about the shots. But Humana, shit those bastards sent me to collections for something i never got a bill for in the first place. I was very angry and took it out on my Dad...sorry Dad.
• Too excited to come back to my apartment and just sit. But then my kitchen was so messy I decided to clean. And my plan to play RollerCoaster tycoon was thwarted by some game gliche that kicks me out whenever I start getting anywhere. I'll try to figure that one out this weekend.

And now, could be 100,000 people dead in the scariest natural disaster since, well, ever in my lifetime. I'm thinking I should make a donation, and I think the rest of you should too...because I just have a bad feeling about how Bush is going to handle this. This is when the big nations should step up, but it seems unlikely. How scary is it that one day the world is normal and the next people rotting everywhere because of a huge earthquake. Just shows you how unpredictable the world is. Note to readers: My sister is far more eloquent than I am, i tend to write from humor, since thats how I think. So read her entry on this, i didn't even know she'd written it when I wrote this entry.

Next up: California falls in the ocean.

I hope all have a very safe and happy New Year. I'm headed home to see a long-lost relative and have a quiet Eve, because I don't really enjoy this holiday.

Christmas high school style..

I don't mean that in a bad way all you high school haters. I just mean I spent tonight with my good friends from high school celebrating our late Christmas. Some of us don't live in the same state (Ok, 1 out of 4) and the rest of us are still in the area. But it was nice. Its fun to just be girls.

I am seriously tired because my radiator sounded like this last night: eeeeeeeeeeeeee swwooosh. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee swoosh. Over and over. It was hideous. I'm going to try turning it off tonight and seeing how cold it gets. Plus, the new pillow...not so good. I may just have to stick with the old rotty one. My sleep issues are intense, I cannot imagine adding a second party. You know how people used to sleep in twin beds...that might be me if i ever get married or live with someone (only our twin beds would not even be in the same room). I thought I was getting better at sleeping...guess not.

Started my allergy shots today. Must say, I was expecting some huge mutant needle. It was tiny, and the "injection" lasted maybe 2 seconds. I was talking to her and she grabbed my arm fat (yes please do visualize this, it was a little humiliating) and stuck the needle in before I was even gearing up for it. And in my shock and awe at how quickly the injection was over I managed to again not pay attention while she did the other arm (yes i am doing two shots, one for cat the other for other allergies. i'm waiting to see on the cost issue...if the health insurance is stingy then i'll lean towards just cat).

All in all, a full day. But in a good way. And tomorrow...SpamALot. Should be cracking good fun (yes, cracking). Its a great adjective.

Holidays...over...

Hello all. Let me start with a little shock, a little giggle about the comment on the last entry. Someone clearly has issues with cat lovers. I quite enjoyed that comment, even if it was slightly snappy. Merry Christmas dog lover...(and FYI, i too like dogs, and will have one someday, but as a person with an apartment that is unfair. Plus, i'm not home all day, dogs need to be walked etc.)

The holidays were merry. I enjoyed spending time with all my crazy relatives. There's not a sane one in the bunch (myself included). I hope everybody liked their presents. I got tons of good stuff and spent most of this afternoon cleaning all my new kitchen items (pots, crockery, tupperware...and lots of it). Parents and grandparents were extremely generous, I am one lucky duck.

I hope everyone out there enjoyed the holidays as much as I did. I hope you're all safe and happy and well fed. Now I'm going to bed. I have a long week ahead...with a New Years Eve dud at the end....

One more before Christmas...

There was tons of Christmas cheer at the office today that I was almost sad to be taking a half day. I got more presents than I expected, since I expected zero and received from three different people. One is almost ugly, but I am strangely attracted to it. But sometimes I do tend to be attracted to the ugly. I had a weird moment when the vice president hugged me while my hands were full...and I tend towards "bad with hugs" anyway, so it was a little awkward. I think i got through it alive and with dignity.

So I had a half day because I wanted to test my allergy to cats. My cat at home, Allie aka binker, sometimes makes my eyes itch like a beast. So i thought it may be smart to find out if there was anything i could do about it. Well, it turns out I am allergic to cats and the recommended solution: avoidance. Which is not an option. So I can either wait and get one of these mutants (i don't know, but that creeps me out), suffer with allergy pills or start allergy shots. At the beginning (8-9 months) I get a shot once a week..then i move up to twice a week etc. These shots are expensive. But i need something else alive in this apartment.

Isn't it a bitch that I'm not allergic to dogs (the complicated pet)?

Christmas is coming...

The goose is getting fat...

In this instance, the goose is me. But the cookies, chocolate and fudge are well worth it. And I'm enjoying imagining all the good eats i'll be having this weekend. After that...its back to weightwatchers for me.

I'm having a good day for no particular reason. Everyone at work was cheery, no bad moods or bad phone calls from pushy people. My review was good, although I would have preferred excellent. There's something about my place of work that makes me believe no one gets excellent. Ever. Stingy with the excellent.

I have stuff to do now. If i don't blog again, Merry Christmas! I hope your holidays are filled with family, friends and love! Oh, and good food.

And if you haven't been here in a while, this is an excellent entry (Yub-Nub) for my favorite celeb...read it, laugh and be merry for the holidays!

Christmas party antics....

Boy oh boy was it an intensely strange day. A little fill-in: I had my holiday party today, at noon we all left, went to a delicious restaurant (name withheld to protect myself from prying colleagues, just in case...).

Wow.

I was told beforehand (by a bitter, more on them later) that the party is awkward, and we all try to mingle and then leave as soon as the food is gone. Ok, whoever said that lied. And not a white lie, a big honking juicy lie.

It was nice because I sat next to quiet new girl (ok, new lady, she's married with two small children) and my underwriter. We all bonded. Then time wore on and people started to get maybe a little drunk. Just so you all know, I decided to abstain since my tolerance is non-existent and I did not want to be the drunk girl suggesting we all do a round of shots. I mean, I am trying to prove myself as the youngest. Instead of me, it was a drunk woman (late 50s) suggesting a round of shots. 12 people said yes. There are roughly 20 people at our company. I was involved in a conversation about caning, peeing on people and fisting. This is not your average Christmas party here. Oh, and just in case you thought maybe I was some renegade speaking with other outcasts, the dirty conversation involved both vice presidents. I'm blown away by this party.

I never realized that not drinking anything besides water was going to be an issue. But oh boy did I get harassed. Maybe because as some put it, "you're 23, you should be plastered all the time." My response: did that in college. When I try to explain to people that I'm not really like that, I don't enjoy drinking all that much, they don't understand. Eventually, the drunk guy (new guy, very boisterous) was harassing me so much, my boss and company owner threatened him with italian mob connections of my dads (which as far as I know, do not exist). Truly interesting. And cute new guy (not the drunk) was very much cute. Since i found out quiet new girl is married with children, i feel like my competition for cute new guy has decreased (she's very cute). The only competition left is his girlfriend. Who rumor has it, he lives with. I can slay that dragon.....

Then I caught a ride home with "the bitters." This is what I am going to call the people who hate their job, life and everyone around them. During the party most of this crowd remained in one corner overtly making fun of others. My underwriter even commented, you know, its amazing that they do that so openly. These are also the people who surround my cubicle. Lucky me. By sitting there, I have somehow become OK with them. Somehow, I'm accepted in this group because out of their mouths, "You're all right Katiekins, you mind your own business." So, I got to listen to them rip into every little thing the people they don't like did (everyone in the company besides themselves). I was even mentioned (i'm smart because i know who my dad is, and i'm using that to help myself...nice, huh?). Anyway, it was an eye-opener.

Here's my take on things: one girl got ripped on during the car ride for saying that the bitters were the way they are because they don't "play the game" (she said this at dinner where her tongue may have been a little loose, don't worry, she was not in the car). Sure, this whole work thing is politics, and the bitters are on the wrong side completely. But the smart way to look at this is not the way said girl does. You shouldn't play the game. You should just be a respectful, respectable, decent human being, work hard and you'll get where you want to go. I will not be an underwriter because of my dad (although thanks for the "in" dad), he just got my foot in the door. Now that my foots in, it is my job to work for it, not to play for it. I guess the way i see it is that the bitters don't know what hard work is and cannot possibly be happy people, which is why they need to belittle others. But I am happy. I can sit, listen to them and keep my mouth shut and therefore be "accepted." Or I could stoop to their level and rip on them to others. Which is the right way?

Moving on:
A while back, maybe in middle of November, I had a moment with a cute guy on the train. There was a conversation we pretty much had to listen in on and were both smirking, and caught each other and smiled, etc. Yesterday he was on my El again. Not as cute as I remember. But I think he was trying to have a moment again. I sort of panicked. My plan is, next month when I see him again, I'll have the moment. Why not?

On the ride home today a very cute boy and I were making eyes at each other. Its wonderful to see cute boys, be able to almost openly stare and realize you will never see them again. Liberating...

Complete and utter torture...

Today maybe hasn't been the best. Work was fine, everything was going great and then I get home. No mail. Ok, not a big deal, but still no fun.

I get to my messages. First, the doctor leaves a scary, please call us right away message. I can't really call until tomorrow, but that should be great fun. I assume it'll be nothing. But of course, the urgent message has to make me worry.

And then I decide to call Comcast and tell them they suck. So my basic cable still is unwatchable. I get all the digital channels, but NBC is completely torturous to watch (fuzzy seriously bad shaking double picture with static noises). WGN/WB has faint double picture that might be getting worse, etc. So I call. I tell them the problem still has not been resolved (three scheduled appointments, one cancelled without telling me, so i still spent the sunday at home waiting for the cable guy, the other two actually happened). Ok, that's three Saturday or Sundays wasted. I hate this. I'm being punished for wanting to watch Scrubs. She honestly said to me on the phone, but you have 100s of other channels. But I don't care about the 100s of other channels, give me basic cable.

Every single time my appointment goes like this: Oh, you already have an amplifier. Ok. Let me see the outside. Oh yeah, bad wiring out back, you need a line technician. I'll schedule the appointment for next week, you don't need to be around for that. Problem should be fixed. Three line technicians later, SAME PROBLEM. I feel like screaming. I wish I could switch my cable company, and this next time, if they don't fix it, I'm calling my landlord. My landlord makes us use certain companies for all our utilities. No problems with the power or water or phone, but fucking cable.

I am really upset. Its just the small stuff you know? And i'm sure all you boys out there love to hear this, but i'm hormonal, and the lady being rude and telling me to change the channel makes me cry. And she must know i'm crying because you can't talk like a normal person when you're upset. Maybe if I was a man, and had a deep scary voice they would take me seriously. But instead i have to schedule another useless appointment for Saturday. Where I promise, i know he will tell me that there's nothing he can do and a line technician will be out sometime this week.

I'm going to bed. Maybe this week will get better. I get off early on Friday, maybe i'll be really bad and buy myself a whole chocolate cake to make up for this whole debacle. Maybe sometime in the future i'll be able to watch Scrubs...

Sorry to be such a downer kids, i'm supposed to be in the Christmas spirit. I'll go water my christmas tree now and go to sleep and hope tomorrow will be better.

Winter cheer...

-- I get a little warm in my heart when i think of winter...--

The christmas tree is up! And tinseled! Ok, so i tried to take a picture, but as you can tell, I am not photographer. You really do not get the full effect of the lights and the tinsel. But nothing much I can do. I was getting grief for not posting a picture or blogging for a week or so (sorry masses, I've been really busy decorating, present buying and christmas carding). At the end of each day this weekend my back was KILLING me, so i sat on the couch and felt proud of all i'd accomplished. I wish I could have christmas decorations up year round. My apartment feels homey. But i do think the coffee table helped. I am the kind of person that feels more comfortable in smaller spaces (but not so small as to be claustrophobic), anyway, the coffee table makes the living room feel better to me. Smaller. Is that weird?

So do you ever say something, and then the second its out of your mouth you're like...uh WHAT?? Because I did that today. I don't know if I was a little spacey (ok, i do know, i was...but i woke up at 3am last night with a pounding headache...sidetrack: the weirdest thing happened when I went down at 3am to take advil. My cell phone was lit up. Which only happens if i've just opened it or if someone is calling, neither of which was happening in this case. Ghost maybe??). Back to the point, I was leaving for the day, quite excited to get out of work and come home and eat leftover tacos (good for me for making tacos). One of the vice presidents of my company (read: head honcho) was in the elevator with me. As we were parting for different exits I said, "have a good tomorrow." what i meant to say was "have a good night, see you tomorrow" i think. But it didn't come out like that. She said thanks. How weird of a moment. It is almost a little mortifying.

I'm off to watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail. I know I've seen parts (i've probably seen every part, just not all at once), but i've been told I have to watch it. We're going to Spamalot at the very end of December...

Happy winter! Even with the cold I like the winter. Aaahh, winter.

My living room, with my newly installed coffee table (watch out, there is one wonky leg) and pretty "holographic" snowflake lights in the window. If you haven't been to visit, the fireplace is on the other wall, across from the big couch, the balcony for the second floor looks down at this view (i'm under the overhang for the balcony). More pictures sometime... 

My christmas tree...notice the fuzzy star and the weird extending arm of one branch. But it looks great, and I love it... 

look out! i'm bloggin' again...

I wasn't going to blog today. I have this theory that people don't read your previous blog because they get stuck on your current blog and therefore they miss out on fun things. But I had the weirdest thing happen earlier, and just now i had a bad thing happen. So here they are.

This is me, at the cleaners at 8am:
Me: Hi, i have one pair of pants.
Little asian cleaner man (old): You are tiny! ha ha ha, how tiny are you? You must wear size two.
Me: Um, no.
Him: No, ha ha ha, size 4?
Me: Nope.
Him: What? No, what size you wear?
Me: Uhhh, 8.
Him: (scandalized) What?? (walking around the counter to come and check things out for himself) No way. You're so small.

Ok, yes, this did happen. How could i make this up? At first, i was kind of weirded out, then i was like, hell yeah, i'm tiny. But then I got right back to totally weirded out. It was kind of invasion of my privacy a little and very, very weird. I don't think i enjoyed the thing at all.

And just now, the bad thing that happened is that my sink won't turn off. It's been threatening for weeks. But yes, the bathroom sink will not turn off. I'm concerned that the plinking water will keep me awake. If i'm crabby tomorrow...you know why. The landlord's first test....will they pass?

so this is love...

No I'm not in love. But I did see On the Record, and for some reason thats the one Disney song out of about 60 that got stuck in my head. That and that song from Mulan that Christina Aguilera sang. The four main singers in the musical were pretty mind-blowing as far as the whole singing thing goes. I was asking my mom if she ever wished she could sing like that, i mean, what would it be like to open your mouth and have pure beauty come out? I was saying I could never be on stage, but i'd be belting out songs all the time in my apartment, specifically from the balcony. Even with my horrible tone deaf voice, I plan on staging some wonderful interpretations of Disney songs from my balcony any day now.

As I walk up the stairs in my apartment (duplex) I always notice the one or two VERY hollow stairs at the bottom of the case. I can't help but wonder if sometime back in the day someone stashed hidden treasure. I honestly wonder this. Just goes to show I should not be 23. Anyway, the building is old, there could be good stuff under there. But, here is what would happen if i pried off the stair: the stair would be ruined and unsalvagable and then what the hell do i do? Plus, there would only be animal carcasses and giant mutant hairy spiders in there. But oh how I wonder every time i hit those stairs...

Does anyone remember Bedknobs and Broomsticks? Because while watching Disney last night, I couldn't help but remember some of the old great movies of my childhood...and I somehow keep remembering this one. Anyone? Also, there was a song in On the Record that came from a movie I had never even heard of, "So Dear to My Heart." Any ideas? The song is Lavender Blue. And strangely, the flower place I got my Mom flowers from at Thanksgiving uses a quote from that song on their card. Weird...

just let go...

I've been thinking a lot lately about growing up. Its always so scary to move on from high school to college, because you're a "grown up." Or even turning 21 (which i managed to do with particular style spending hours and hours at Heathrow airport trying to get to Rome on a plan that kept getting delayed). Lately though, I really am growing up.

Everyday on the "L" there are dozens of people that could be roughly my age (lets have a wide range here, between 22 and 30). All of these women look so turned out. In their nice coats, boots, pretty work bags, slick hairdos. They all look old and they all look the same. And then there's me. I have reverted back to a back-pack, i wear sneakers to work and then change, i still have a fuzzy ball on my hat and my coat is mostly a warmth provider and not a fashion statement.

I used to think that this fashionable young working Chicago woman was what I wanted to be. But i don't think i'm capable of such a huge change. I guess I just cannot imagine having aching feet, a freezing head and a backache every night just so that I look good on the ride to and from work. Sure, when i get to work, it's all business. I put on the nice shoes, take off the coat and hat and stow the backpack. Maybe if i had the other mentality, the one where its more important what you look like than how you feel, maybe then what?...maybe then someone would pick me up on the "L"?

I have always been an odd one. I guess certain things I take very seriously, like my work ethic and certain things i don't, like the new trendy coat style. I cannot imagine going on a four hour lunch with a colleague and coming back a little drunk (it happened) or being so unable to do my work that i lie and blame it on someone else (also happens). I take pride in my work. I don't particularly enjoy drinking either, which does sometimes categorize me in the "old lady" section. But at the same time, I love stupid things, like Chicago lit up for Christmas, Harry Potter (oh the third movie was a thrill tonight),my future cats and probably the musical i'll see tomorrow night that is all Disney songs (got some ridicule at work for that, but i stood my ground, i'll like it).

Its just interesting to think that if i wanted to, if i truly tried i could be dressed to the nines on the "L", but screw "What not to Wear," its all lies. That stuff isn't comfortable.

Ah Chicago..

On my way home from work today, while on the "L" I was quite enjoying the city lights. When you ride the brown line around the loop you can catch a glimpse down State street, and other areas that just look dazzling during Christmas-time. Anyway, I'm always one of the "L" riders who is gazing out the window. People must think I've never seen it before, but its like new every time.

Tonight for some reason I was more awed than usual. Possibly because it was a fair night and I could actually see things out the window. But man, the Chicago theatre sign was amazing. And then I stopped paying attention. Because really, between the loop and Fullerton (my stop), things are kind of residential. I was trying to see christmas trees in windows, but thats all. Except...right after or right before Sedgwick, i can't remember which, the "L" line is running through a fairly low building area. I startled out of my daydream (vivid one, about Gael Garcia Bernal, so attracted to him) to the most beautiful view of the entire city. So clear, and all lit up. I could see from the Hancock clear past the Sears Tower. I throughly recommend gazing out an "L" window on the brown line. Just make sure you're on the left side of the car, next to the window.

I loved you Guinevere...

I am very tired (isn't it just the way it works that the day you go back to work after a long break is always exhausting?), and plan to get in bed quickly. So i apologize if there may be some spelling and or grammatical errors. I'm already having some trouble with Guenivere. Because that's how some websites have it, but i personally think it looks better like i spelled it (although the more i look at it, the stronger I feel on its misspelling. but i'm keeping it, because i still prefer it to all the e's in the right one).

I have some pain in my leg, which i contribute to one of three things:

1. Walking around all day yesterday at the zoo (the zoo!)
2. I'm dying of a blood clot (i am a hypochondriac, this should have been expected)
3. I did a little jig earlier and I wrenched something? (for those of you who have spent excessive amounts of time with me, you know what kind of jig I am speaking of. For the rest of you: sometimes, usually with no aid of music or anything of the sort, i will break into a little dance. I do not know why i do this, except I'm usually feeling chipper and have no outlet besides a little dance. Personally, i think the world would be happier if more people danced around sometimes. And not in a pretty way, in a happy geeky way.)

I had a wonderful dream last night about a boy from high school. I had a crush on him when I was a junior and he was a freshmen. I may have even taken a job because he worked there (the reasons i took the job are fuzzy...it may be because he worked there and i can be stalker-esque, or it may be because a friend of mine worked there and got me the in, we'll never know). Incidentally, we became some kind of friends, and he liked me when i was a senior and he was a sophomore...but no dice, i'd already moved on. Plus i have a horrible disease where i never like anyone that likes me (its true! i may be dying from it, or just it may be why i'm alone). Anyway, it was a delightful dream, and i do think it was "implied" that we had sex, except after he spent the night, i woke up and was totally terrified that i had fallen asleep while we were having sex. Yes, we slept in a dream, and i remember feeling like i woke up. And then the fear of having fallen asleep during the juicy parts. Is that weird? I think it may be...maybe it just means i have some sexual insecurities, whatever, who doesn't?

Ok, I must go to bed. One more thing: for those of you who had expressed the same fascination as i with the merchandise mart here in chicago, i now pass it every day on the el. I have some inside scoop: the frustration of not being allowed in as a "commoner" is now over...this weekend, friday, saturday, sunday...open to the public. Some kind of show. I think i'm going. If you're interested I was thinking early Saturday or Sunday. It costs money, but i think it goes to children's memorial...and really, its just a one floor show deal i think (see website). but it says thousands of gifts...and hello, all you people i have to buy presents for get harder every year...

Ah the frustration...

First, I hope everyone's Thanksgiving was great...abundant turkey and stuffing (my fav). My holiday was great, suitably relaxing. However, I must say, that the last day and a half has just been full of horrible, anger inducing frustration. A very small sampling:

• NBC still not working...called comcast, apparently their computer system has some major glitche: If the area they are scheduling an appointment in is suffering an outage, they can't schedule an appointment (does that make any sense?? no). So besides the fact that HBO, and all my other channels are fuzzy (because of said outage) I can't make an appointment for the problem I've had since the beginning of my service (which will not go away after outage). Was that confusing enough?
• Got two letters today from my insurance company. One: Per your request to cancel your homeowners policy, it is cancelled effective Nov. 1 (keep in mind it should have been effective Nov 4, and i NEVER asked to cancel it). Two: a refund check for the premium i already paid on that insurance. What kind of shitty business is this. Per my request? I gave no request.

That was enough frustration to have me screaming. I think i might have been in a foul mood anyway, but its always horrible feeling to have a temper tantrum. Stomping up really loud stairs and yelling swears does little to rid me of my anger, and only embarrasses me later since I tend to get over the crest of my anger fairly quickly. I need someone to punch, would you like to come over and let me hit you?

Housewarming was fun. If you weren't there you missed some good food and interesting conversation. Nothing too funny to report.

Plan for the rest of the weekend is to clean this sty. Possibly involving loud music...

I feel like my blog is not funny. Maybe it'll be funny as soon as I get through all the mundane settling in things (still have a box or two to unpack, obviously still having cable issues etc.). For now...off to squint at my terribly fuzzy TV.

Eeeeek.

There are some things that will never stop being amusing. And some that will never stop being creepy. And others that always give a warm fuzzy feeling. Lets make a list:

Amusing:

1. Man on the "L" with very terrible, placed on top of his head toupee. There was no blending in. It was just there.
2. People tripping and falling but NOT hurting themselves. If they hurt themselves, then its kind of scary. But if they just trip and look embarrassed, that's funny.
3. Some of the things people wear. Seen today: Very long puffy coat, obviously worn over a skirt, with pale legs sticking out. On the feet? White socks and sandals. Yes...this person was getting off of the "L" at rush hour morning time. Going to work where??
4. The silly little habits people have. For example, my "boss" who I assist, when she gets excited tends to talk to herself and make hooray and yippee noses in a high-pitched voice. When she is caught doing this...she is a little embarrassed, but its funny.

Creepy:

1. Overweight, scary, "off-looking" old white guys. Not sure why, but they scare the be-jeezy out of me on the El. They can look really creepy...and then you can't help but look over your shoulder on the walk home.
2. Weird, 800 legged bug that was on my ceiling the other day. It was big and scary. But I am short and scared...and so it is still wandering this apartment somewhere.
3. The sometimes ability to feel what is going on. I have kind of felt like the person who got fired was on "their" way out. And yesterday the office did not feel right. And there were meetings in numerous offices (office doors closed in my office means someone is in trouble). It just felt off. But then, when it did happen, i somehow felt guilty. Because I felt like I had known and should have said something. Which is not a good feeling.

Warm/fuzzy:

1. Puppies! Ok, come on, you knew that was coming (if you know me at all).
2. Watching someone enjoy their music so much that they don't notice they are dancing or singing (or they do and don't care). I saw a guy today dancing seriously behind the wheel of his car. That brought a smile. And a warm/fuzzy.
3. Feeling like I'm happy and secure in my job (even after there's been chaos at work).
4. Waking up in the morning seriously refreshed! Its starting to happen in my apartment! I'm getting used to the noises (old place, it creaks and bangs) and my bed is unbelievable...

Ok, time to stop. I don't know where that all came from. I do have other things...some other time...

Hello again world..

Hello! I'm here, yay! Ok, but only for a short bit (i'm dialing up). Do you know how terrible it is to live without internet? Honestly, at first, no big deal. But I lost touch with many of my friends very quickly. Although more than a few of you have been calling and "real" mailing me, so it's been OK.

My place pretty much kicks ass. Ok, there's times when it feels a little empty (which i think will be fewer once I get some cats),but most of the time i do whatever I want, whenever I want. How delightful!

I have tons to say about Chicago, and issues that have come up with friends and some "deep" stuff (is it deep if you claim its deep, and is it deep if you call it stuff? probably no on both counts).

Quick exciting news: housewarming this weekend, if you want to come, let me know! Most everyone I speak to frequently got an invitation, but that doesn't mean i don't love you infrequent'r's just as much (ok, i don't, it's true. muah-ha-ha).

This is not exciting, but at the same time, its quite huge: someone at work got fired today. Shocking!! She does the same job I did (i got a promotion, yay me!) so there will be more work for me...its complicated, but I will have to help pick up the slack.

Off to study, have a test next week and a big weekend, college friend coming to visit...so much to do!

Moving day...

Is icky. Rainy and cold.

No new blogs for quite some time now...I won't have internet for two weeks or so. So until then...have a good two weeks.

Happy Birthday to me....

I'm old! Ok, no not really, but i am old-er. One year. How lovely. And what a lucky girl I am to have my birthday on election day every 4 years.

I had a nice day. Everyone at work went out of their way to figure out who others were saying happy birthday to. Its like finding the juicy piece of gossip. And I got to flirt with almost cute new guy. Fun.

Its been nice, I like days where everyone pays attention to me (although to be honest, once a year is enough. I'm not good at people paying too much attention: when my underwriter told me she'd take me to lunch soon to celebrate I kind of panicked and ignored. We chatted about it later, but honestly, I'm so awkward). So thanks all for being nice to me!

One more nice thing about my day is that i felt a little better about moving. Spoke with a few chicagoans (cousin, old friend) and I do know people in the city. Woo hoo.

One last thing: GO KERRY

Happy Halloween!

You know that feeling, that if you put something off it will magically get done somehow? Thats kind of how I feel about packing. I've brought all of the shit up from the basement that is still semi-packed from college (ie kitchen/desk stuff). So all I have left is to pack my room. Which is quite an undertaking. I'm moving next Thursday. All of my soon to be built Ikea furniture is already there, couch and bed delivered Thurs....its just the small stuff left to pack, but thats the stuff that will make me feel at home.

All the friends keep asking me why I'm stressed because I'll only be an hour away so if I leave something behind, its not too big of a deal. But part of the reason I feel so stressed is because of how scary this whole thing is. Its hard for people in a couple to understand that I can be happy alone. But even while happy and comfortable in my singleness I still need friends and companionship. And I may not have that in Chicago. So its easy for me to be a little scared about this move. But at the same time, its exciting to make a place of my own.

But for right now, all the scared is at the surface with most of the excited buried down deep.

If I get too busy I may not write again for a few weeks. My internet is going to take a few weeks to work at the new apartment and these next few days may get a little crazy.

So wish me luck.

Frustrations of being an adult...

In a few days I turn 23, which is pretty old. Ok, I know, I have a lot more oldness to come, but I really am officially an adult. Next week, 2 days after turning 23, I'm moving out of the house. And really, this is it. What I mean is, I no longer come back for holidays or move in for the summer. I live on my own now. Weird and very scary.

I have a few frustrations to discuss:

1. First, to all you "coupled" people: would you please leave us singletons alone? I'm so tired of the questions about my love life. I don't ask you about yours. If I have something to report, don't worry, I'll tell you. So until then, STOP ASKING if I have a boyfriend. And really, if you are just getting to know me, my "marital status" does not define me. Even if I were in a relationship, it still would not be who I am. Ask something else. Please.
2. Second, I understand that since I now am in the city every day I am going to see tons of bums. That does not frustrate me (although it is a little sad and I can't help but worry about the cold). What frustrates me is the ones that are clearly not walking the straight and narrow. I mean, the obviously blitzed bums. Why would i give you my money? Come on, make a better choice.
3. Somehow my desk (or piece of cubicle) has ended up smack in the middle of office politics. I have the whiners on each side of me, who tend to be the trouble-makers. I do not want to be bogged down in the politics but I cannot avoid hearing their bitching. Ugh.

But on the plus side, I am excited to try to make a home out of an apartment in the city. But kids, I'm going to be lonely. I can't believe its a week away.

Wow.

Quick note...

I will not name my cat Kit E' Kat (terrible) or Puss N' Boots (torture). If I get two, I will not name them Thelma and Louise or Mork and Mindy.

You know comments delight me, right? And you do realize that anonymous comments are delightfully maddening? Because while I love hearing from you all, the anonymous ones make me think, who's cat is named Kit E' Kat or who's cat is 18? But keep 'em coming, because a little craziness brightens anyone's day.

La la la la...

Hello. I'm crabby again but trying to cheer up. I just read Zach Braff's blog and its about London and how wonderful it is, and Oh, I want to be in London. I too remember when my flatmates were calling people "fit." And there's a plethora of other words I loved, like knackered and apparently my new favorite "bejesus" is an Anglophile thing to say. But appreciation for London and the English is always a cheering thought. So thanks Zach Braff for reminding me that I'm an anglophile.

Another thought I've been having all day is that I need to think of a good cat name or two. For a while I was leaning towards something easy and nick-namey to say. For example, I call my cat Allie "Binker." Now this is obviously not her name, but its perfect for her. So I was trying to think of something that would work right off the bat. My front runners were Leelu and well...leelu. Which I don't really want as a cat name.

I'm trying to find a new idea for a cat name...for example, by looking at Harry Potter name sites...and I'm thinking maybe a Lord of the Rings site? Yes, I am thoroughly nerdy. But not as nerdy as this. Or this. Or this. But that last one does have some good names. Come on Fatty Lumpkin? Perfect for a cat.

Any cat name suggestions? Mildred? Kind of like that....

PS- the new U2 song that's in the IPOD commercial? Does it bother anyone else that he says 1, 2, 3, 14. do you think he means uno, does, tres, cuatro? Not uno, dos, tres, catorce?

A sunday night...

I should be doing my homework or something...but i've taken a short break for some blog action. I don't have much to comment on, just wanted to brag about my pumpkin carving skills. I should be a pumpkin carver as a career (although I would need a lackey to clean out the inside because I hate that).

I was watching one of my 800 shows, Lost, on tape earlier today. If any of you know this show, you know that Merry from Lord of the Rings is a drug-addict stranded on the island. Besides the fact that he's cute and his accent is delightful, I couldn't help but notice his tattoo. It says "Living is easy with eyes closed." I quite enjoy the tattoo and it almost made me like him more. I know there are a lot of you out there that would put a tattoo into a "points against" category. But that tattoo seems meaningful to me, because i can't help but imagine that it means something to him. Although to be honest, i think maybe its just a tattoo that the character has, not the real guy (i think dominic?).

I'm feeling crabby again. Its never-ending.

My mastery of pumpkin carving....the Trick or Treat pumpkin. 

The many loves of this girls life...

Let me just say, the pumpkin carving party was fab-o. Besides the family drama (none of your business) that threatened to ruin the evening, the pumpkins turned out great. And it seems everyone had a good time. I enjoyed myself and have delusions of grandeur-I'm going to carve a wonderful pumpkin this weekend. I'm going to use one of those patterns. I'm already excited.

In case you were wondering, I passed my insurance class midterm with flying colors. And what is shocking is how many people did not pass. The class is pass/fail, and passing is a 60%. Most, if not all of these people are not even paying for this class, their employer is. How can you fail a class that your employer expects you/paid for you to pass? People shock me.

I've decided to chronicle (fancy word for list) the current loves of my life. Alright, really they are just the boys on TV and in movies that I currently lust after.

• First to my mind: Nathan vs. Lucas. Ok, those are TV characters, but I don't know Nathans name in real life. One Tree Hill. Lucas is Chad Michael Murray. All last season I was leaning towards Nathan. Dark, kind of sarcastic and mean AND he has a nipple ring. But this season Lucas shaved his head. Moving on since only 3 people in the world watch that show (me, my mom and med student Janet).
• Zach Braff. Beautiful sense of humor (makes people instantly attractive) but at the same time is obviously able to actually think (see Garden State). The perfect mix. Exactly what I want in a guy (and come on, he's totally cute to boot).
• Matthew Fox. I've become a fan of Lost. New show. Matthew Fox is that old hunk from Party of Five. He's delish. And kind of old. I'm proud of myself for liking someone older than me.
• Ben. Okay, to be honest, I don't even know if thats his name on the show. So its obvious i don't know his name in real life. He's on the new show "life as we know it." Its good watch it. Me and two high school friends usually watch it together...and hes the one whos having an affair with a teacher. But he's totally cute in a nerdy way. At least mine isn't Dino (what a name). Last night I made a beano joke...and it was really funny. Ok, maybe not, but i laughed.
• Adam Brody. Yes I do watch every corny high school shows. The OC, Gilmore Girls, One Tree Hill, you name it I watch it. But Adam Brody has universal appeal...so cute.
• Topher Grace. But not that 70's show Topher, I'm talking Traffic Topher or Win a Date Topher. Eeemmm, Topher.

I feel really silly. Not because i listed cute boys (although that is silly, that's a totally normal Katie kind of silly and nothing to feel silly about). I feel silly because all of those boys are TV boys. I do very little besides watch TV. I mean, that didn't even include any music boys (although i have spoken highly of big baby head, keane lead singer on this blog before). All I'm saying is that I maybe need to get off the couch.

At work I'm going to start training soon I hope. It will be nice to feel like I could be useful in a way that isn't just entering shit into computers and sending faxes.

If you're still reading, you're a good man. Just one more thing: as a single girl working in the city, i am constantly staring at men's ring finger. It's amazing how one goes from college where that isn't even a valid concern to realizing that i'm old now, and that a wife is a valid concern. And even more amazing is how many cute boys have wedding rings. Its a shame really. The new guy at work has no wedding ring. Hes almost attractive, but he's old. somewhere between late 20s and mid-40s (this shows my utter lack of age-judging skills).

Off to sit in cake-filled, comfy couch laziness. Too-da-loo.

Halloween costumes...

Please still read the post right before this one and take the quiz. I've highly enjoyed reading the comments about what "kind of girl" you all are. That doesn't seem like very good english. Ah well, looks like the president and I at least have one thing in common (although I suspect I am smarter than him).

Wanted to post a hilarious moment I had today and compare it to an old hilarious moment. I laughed my ass off just now, over something so silly it probably cannot be recreated for you all. This may be one of those situations where I tell the story and laugh and laugh, and you are silent and sober, and I end the story by saying "you had to be there."

At Target (love Target) there was a lovely display of pet costumes. Many of you may think, "that's animal cruelty" while others giggle and think of their own pet costume. I talked my mom into a costume for both the cat and the dog. Frankenstein for the cat, devil for the dog. Now, the costume consists of a head piece (which is kind of like a stocking cap that velcros on) and little booties (not to cover the foot, but to go around each leg like a band of frilly fun). If you know my dog and cat at all, you realize that this is not going to be accepted well. Animal cruelty is probably closer than giggly fun. But oh man, was the joy of watching them hate the costumes fun. The dog handled the head piece well, she somehow managed to flip it around so her devil eyes and horns were around her neck facing downwards. The leg-bands...oh joy, for some reason, she could not understand them and started high-stepping. The cat had the same reaction. And watching two animals prance and high step around the kitchen and living room was comedy personified. The cat did not tolerate the headpiece, she immediatly starting batting at her head. Not only that, the minute it got close to her head she flattened her ears so that I couldn't get them through the ear holes (pure genius on her part). Oh god, highstepping dog and cat. So funny.

Haven't laughed this hard that i can remember (i am sure I have but its not nearly as memorable) as when a friend of mine ran full tilt into a screen door. Not a glass door, a screen door. Not only was it hilarious the way she bounced (sorry friend! i know it hurt, but it was funnnny) but she left a face imprint on the screen. Not an indentation, an imprint. The screen was so dirty that half her face was covered in screen dirt...and the screen had been cleaned right where her face was. Oh hilarity.

Or maybe the time that my crazy housemates thought it would be funny to see if very drunken Katie could fit into a wrapping paper holder (like a plastic rubbermaid bin only tall and garbage can shaped to fit the wrapping paper). Not only were we all in lingerie (drunken girls think the stupidest things are funny, like a lingerie after-party), but we all took turns in the wrapping paper bin. I was just the only one to fall over and crash into the table. I had the ugliest bruise the next day, but ooooh boy, did we get a laugh. Please don't read this and think I was a stupid, drunk college girl. I was very far from it, closer to nerdery.

Love the laughter of silly events.

Love it.

So sneezy..

I only have one point today and that's just this: you can't really learn much about yourself from an online quiz. My lovely sister had a link to a quiz on her website. I thought, hmmm, yes, what kind of girl am I? I was curious. I mean, her's seemed to fit. And then I got the answer to mine: "You're a hybrid of: Girl Next Door Academic Girl."

I find several issues with my mixture.

1. The girl next door is said to want to surround herself with family (that's fine, i love my family) but it makes her sound like a stay-at-home-mom. And while I might enjoy the "life of leisure" that I secretly dream a life like that is (although, lets be honest, raising a child is more work than going to work), I don't want children. I can't conceive a time when I will want to conceive. Ok...that was lame.
2. The girl next door is likely to own a bible??? I believe in life and people, but not in religion or God. I am solidly an atheist and have been for years.
3. The academic sounds like an intellectual snob. Not only do I not have a thesis, I don't even know who Noam Chomsky is. Although I read like a demon, about one book in 50 has any intellectual merit (if that).
4. Both of these descriptions have contradictions of the other in them. Which really makes the most sense. A walking contradiction. That sounds right.

So, what do you readers that know me think? Girl next door + academic make sense? And if you're a girl (or a secure male) take the test, share your description and if it makes any sort of sense for you in my comments. If you're reading this and its a few days after I wrote it and there's still no comments, take pity and make a comment.

Happy 30th anniversary bloggggy...

Welcome to my 30th blog. Glad to have you. I am again a little on the grumperific side. I was having an alright morning until about 9:15...when I began to hate my stomach. Its not that i was actually ill, its just that i felt uncomfortable all day. Just an unsettled stomach.

The cat has been eating her pills. I must say, whoever anonymous is with their 18 year old cat, wow. Thats old.

Everyday I walk over the "Lyric Opera" bridge to get to and from the train station and when buses or large trucks drive over it the whole thing goes kerplunk. It moves and makes a banging shaking noise. Its horrifying. I can't wait to move so I don't have to walk across the bridge.

I boycotted the debate because I hate politics. And I hate the way the debate makes me angry and feel totally helpless. Come on people, why did politics go so astray?? There's got to be some good guys out there that want to run. Right? Even if you hate them all, you should accept your right and "duty" as a citizen of this country and vote. Even if you write yourself in.

My brain is quite dead. I am staring sightlessly into space at this very moment. I swear I'll write to you pen pals this weekend.

Grumpy girl...

So there are a number of reasons why I am not in a good mood and I have got to get it out.

1. My sleep last night was crappy so I am very tired. Plus the disappointment that my high class, expensive latex pillow is actually a neck killer because I sleep on my stomach makes me depressed. I wanted those pillows to be my pillows forever. Stupid stomach sleeping..
2. My knee is pretending to be 80 years old. That's right, i ache like an old lady. And for a while there it was a piercing, never-ending ache that was almost cry-inducing. But remember, I am tired. However, I took advil and now its gone.
3. The cat hates me. I like my cat a lot. She is old (15) but she has become so much nicer. She's been sick and went to the vet (where my mom tells me she was actually nice to the vet, whom she normally hates and tries to attack). Apparently her liver is failing, her heart rate is too fast, her thyroid isn't working and she has an ear infection. She hates me because of the ear "ointment" and trying to force the pills (still haven't gotten her to eat them, any suggestions??). Don't want the cat to die, it already is sad enough that I have to leave her behind.
4. I have a midterm tomorrow. I care very little...but it is important. I've studied 4 of the 5 chapters, its multiple choice, and I am really, really not scared. But what if I do poorly? I mean, work is paying for me to pass this class. On the basis of this class I become an underwriter. And yet chapter 5, "Underwriting" is the one chapter I haven't studied. I want to be done with school. I just need to pass. I quit caring.

To my pen pals....there are a few of you who read this, I sincerely apologize for not writing recently. I was so busy running around and worrying this weekend that I forgot to be a good friend. I hope to write as soon as I get this test out of the way. Sorry to be so blah...but I'm kind of down.

The inability to think...

I am unable to think of anything to call this entry although I was trying valiantly. Its been a long and very busy weekend which has prevented any truly exciting blog entries. All in all, I haven't been thinking much about anything except furniture. I signed my apartment lease on Wednesday and ever since have been full of thoughts on coffee tables and chairs and drapes. Its a really, really boring thing for the rest of you if I start talking about my furniture search. So I'll just keep quiet for a bit here. You can imagine that once I do move down to Chicago, I'll have lots of time on my hands to write blogs for you all.

I do have a test on Wednesday, my midterm, so I should go study. Sorry if i'm not entertaining....it'll be back soon enough.

What? Um yeah...

I feel the makings of a crazy blog coming on. Why? Because I am reading a book called Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs and man is that guy crazy. Although I am enjoying his weird pop culture connections.

• Today someone at work "atta-girled" me. This phrase vaguely makes me think of a dog that has done something good. Sit. Atta-girl. The context of my "atta-girl" was so opposite of the correct time for it, that next to the shock I felt perplexed rather than angry. In any other circumstance I would have been angry. Here's how it happened: I was in the file room looking for a file. A big man (who is a know-it-all that i'm glad is in the accounting department) came in to get what he had printed. He obviously had forgotten to push print. He asked me if I had stolen what he had printed (in an obvious joking way) and I said yes (joking back). He then said, "atta girl." Now, is it just me or does this totally not fit the situation?? And anyway, who says atta-girl?

• Today while walking down the street on the way to the train, I made up a little song. Here are the lyrics: "walking and eating, eating and walking." That's it. It was inspired by one of the largest people I've ever seen walking at the fastest pace I've ever seen a large person walking. And I thought to myself, well, why is she so fat? I mean, she's moving, she's not just sitting on the couch. And then I noticed the rather large Rice Krispie treat. She was walking and eating. Eating and walking. I've made up a total of two songs in my life. The first was when I was a wee one, when I sensed injustice in my family and decided to vent my frustration by voicing it in song. That song is MUCH more advanced than "walking and eating." The brilliant lyrics: "I'm the Mom. You're the kid. I win. You lose." Catchy stuff eh? The second is about an obese lady and her rice krispie treat. Genius.

• On the same note, I always tell my mom I should be a singer. I mean, I find joy in belting out a song. Although my songs of choice are not necessarily pop star material because they are almost always inspired by a commercial(most recently "A Whole New World." Aladdin DVD coming out..you should really pick up a copy). My mom always laughs and says, uh huh, keep dreaming. I'll admit, I do lack some of the things necessary for this career choice, mainly a super-svelte body, a wish to have everything I ever do be public and a singing voice. The last obviously being the most crucial for a singer. My singing...its pretty hideous. But I like to torture others with it...and I enjoy singing, a lot. So i do it anyway. I'll just never be famous for it (unless I'm famously bad...although who wants to be William Hung, his career really makes me sad).

• Ok, so there's this commercial...its about fresh meat or something. But I am always disturbed because at the end of the commercial the guy says, "Nice choice Mrs. Freshy Freshington" or something very close to that. Now, I've been using this adjective style for a LONG time (and getting lots of shit for it). I mean, anything can be made better by using it...if your friend is speeding, "speedy speederson," if your friend is a drunkard, "drunky drunkerton." But hearing it in a commercial creeps me out. Because that means that its spread from the few people I know to some weird commercial.

• Saw a college friend for lunch. I'll not mention names for the sake of keeping her free from stalkers. But it was lovely. I'm trying to convince her to blog...she's at pharmacy school, a newlywed and commutes 2 to 2 and a half hours everyday to go to school. This is a girl who could have interesting things to say. Are there crazy people on your train? Do we need to worry about a certain drugs terrible, secret side affects? Does the new husband sing in the shower? I mean...it could be great to read. I think if you are reading this and think that my lovely college friend should start a blog you should encourage her.

• As a "technical assistant" I am trying to come up with ways to not suck up, but raise my worth in the eyes of the bosses. I'm trying to make an impression, so they'll realize I'm good and 1)give me a raise and 2)make me an underwriter quickly. My plan is to just use any situation to its advantage. There were two situations this week. First: I noticed that the other 3 technical assistants were all making the same mistake on issuing policies. This was a majorly bad mistake that could seriously hurt the company. Really, there is no choice but to bring it up to the office manager. If I ignored it, everything would be issued wrong. That can't be good for the company and the big boss would have been seriously pissed at us all when he found out. Plus, by telling the office manager, I earn major points for being observant and not making the same mistake. However, there is some anger with the three other tech assistants. They clearly are angry that I did not make the same mistake and are starting to form feelings of dislike. I can feel it. But honestly...not my fault. The second situation: the vice prez of the company comes up to me with a book and says, have you read this? I think you'd really like it. Its so not my kind of book, but hello, the vice prez of the company wants to share a book, I'm going to read it and like it. Gotta brown nose a little (that term, really gross when you think about it).

Off to play endless games of spider and lose many of them while watching my Tuesday night corny, crappy teen shows.

Ode to dots...

I feel scattered and unable to think very well or very clearly. But I still have a few observations I would like to share with you...

1. There is something spectacular about dots. Not polka dots. I'm talking, gummy candy in a box dots. If you have not indulged recently, go buy a box (but be careful, if the place you buy them from does not sell them quickly, the dots may be hard and stale). My sweet tooth's heart belongs to the dot.
2. Which incidentally, is not helping the diet. I've been terrible recently. Instead of losing weight or even maintaining a weight, I am in fact gaining weight. I have to get back on the diet. I keep thinking, oh, when I move to the city I'll get back on the diet. But that is a month away, I can't afford to keep gaining weight.
3. Boo hoo for me right? But no really, my body is rebelling. Besides gaining weight, I have noticed a lovely wrinkle on my forehead. Its in my nose scrunching area. I think it may have something to do with the terrible habit i have of swiping my nose in an upward motion. Which has given me a scar across my nose, and now a wrinkle? And yet I just wiped my nose in that way just now. Oh well...i guess i'll just embrace my wrinkle.

That's all for now. I know I had many other ideas today, most of which were not whiny in nature, but I cannot remember them because I am space cadet Katie today.

A pain behind my eye...

After a long weekend spent celebrating my cousin's marriage, I am thoroughly exhausted (by the way, congratulations newlyweds!). On to the few things I have thought about this weekend..

• Being in a catholic church this weekend was a surreal experience. Besides the fact that i was seeing my first cousin get married (a cousin who i grew up alongside), the whole experience was very interesting. As someone who does not have religion, watching the ceremony and all that goes with it was a little weird. There is something about God and religion that i just don't belong with. At the same time, it was nice to see the cousin get married. I don't know, religion perplexes me.

• I think that in general I am just an awkward person. Have I already mentioned this? Maybe I have...but i just am not good with spanking new people. Give me a few hours and I'll get comfortable and friendly...but right off the bat, I tend towards shy. Sometimes I fear people think i'm snobby or something because i have a tough time talking to new people. I guess I'm just a slow adapter, I have comfort issues.

• All families are crazy. Or so I hope. But mine, well, we have an extra dose of nutty than most. Seeing the family in their drunken glory though...now that is what makes a family function so eventful. The dancing aunts and uncles, the crying and of course the jokes and laughing, makes me realize that anything else would be boring. How boring would family gatherings be without all those hijinks?

• I love Disney World. I'm watching Disney World unwrapped right now. I've been to disney world once a year for about 3 or 4 years in a row now. And this year, I'm breaking that record by not going...isn't that sad??

I'm getting sick...headache and a runny nose, so I'm going to go vege. Although I do have homework....

If he had it his way...

I vowed not to talk about politics on this blog because i do think its unfair that there is no one to argue the other side...but I have to make a comment or two about the debates.

• If Bush had things his way, i think the debate would have been a bickering contest. And I must say, I think Bush might win that kind of debate. Because most of what he said was petulant, like a little boy who imagines someone else is winning and longs to kick him. I think Bush had a gleam in his eye and something in his weird little creepy cackle that exuded evil. Ok, that might be a little strong, but i think he does have a creepy air about him. The man just makes me uncomfortable. Did you ever have a neighbor/family friend/uncle that was creepy and you called him the "child molester?" Well, I did, and thats who Bush reminds me of.

• Is it just me or did John Kerry seem like the only intelligent one there?

• I must agree with my sister that this flip-flopping thing is out of hand. That was Bush's only point (that and that Kerry can't possibly get the support of other countries or our troops if he believes this war was entered into wrongly at the wrong time). He was a broken record. I got bored. And honestly, GOOD LORD, if you can't change your mind, doesn't that say something about the quality of said mind? The most intelligent people can learn from their mistakes (and if they can't, then their arrogance is impeding their intelligence and they no longer qualify as intelligent).

• That was my first debate. I kind of wish I had watched the one between Gore and Bush. But you can't go back.

• Everyone on these shows after the fact is crazy pro-Bush. I wonder if its because they are actually running the country through Bush's ear piece.

That's it....I'm off and doing what I didn't want to in that i'm being political. I apologize. But I can't imagine anyone my age truly believing in Bush. If you're in your twenties and like Bush, please tell me why. I'd love to hear it, truly. It intrigues me. I do tend to believe what Janet said in that a lot of you may just be following along with the opinions of the media and of your parents. And if so, I do understand where you're coming from, but maybe you shouldn't be reading this, you should be watching the debates yourself and not listening to all the people who skew the stuff to what they believe.

Off to Michigan for a wedding this weekend...no blogs for a while.

A confession...

As some of you may know, I am sort of a loner. I like to be by myself and am not really the kind of person who can "bare their soul." I tend to keep my emotions entirely to myself. Along with many of my thoughts. Which is why it was nice to start a blog and maybe get some of those things out. And now is the time to tell a secret. And really, the secret is still something that i find very personal and belonging to me. But there's only so much guilt I can handle. And its getting really annoying being careful.

So my little confession here only will really shock and dismay one person. The dad. And while I would have liked to have told him in person, I will shame-facedly admit that it was impossible. I had intentions of telling him more than once and chickened out. Anyway, on to let the cat out of the bag.

So a few months ago I got a tattoo. Thats right, I have officially had a tattoo for quite a while now. And sister dear, if you are even thinking of using the verb or noun "tat" please stop now. I hate that term, TAT. The guy who tattooed me nearly made me change my mind when he said, All right, lets tat you up. Thats so trashy.

Ok, so why not just be open about the tattoo? Well, the pops is anti-"body mutilation" which includes piercing of any sort and tattoos. He still asks my sister about the third piercing in her lobe. And I think in his eyes, piercings close up and a tattoo is forever. I decided to get the tattoo after years of wanting it....my thought was, if i've wanted it for years, then i'll probably want it forever. So I did it.

Its cute.
I like it.
I will never regret it.

So, none of this "why didn't you get it tattooed across your forehead?" Because that would be ugly. And while my tattoo may be visible when i bend over (hence the need to be careful around the dad....and like Mandy said in her comment my crack does show sometimes in my pajamas when i bend over, it can't be helped, it happens to the best of us.), it is a personal thing. It is MY tattoo. It is not for all of you to stare at.

So there you have it. I am tattooed. And happy about it.

Alex and I have discussed the tattoo thing...and for some reason it seems reasonable to both of us that people get addicted to it. Now, neither of us are going to tattoo our whole bodies...but it really is an intriguing and fun activity.

So, Dad, are you mad?

He made a baby..

I secretly want to call one of my entries "pockets full of thoughts" but i know how lame that is so i avoid it.

• I'm reading a crappy romance novel right now and it is quite dirty. Now, for those of you who don't know, a romance novel is basically a step down from erotica but a step up from "girly fiction." Plus, you get a really cheesy romantic ending where love conquers all and all that jazz. This is not good literature. But everyone needs a little gratuitous sex and romance to brighten the day. A spot of trash in a boring working day. My point here was that everyone has guilty pleasures, and this one is providing many a delightful daydream (although not about Luc, the hero of the book, more along the lines of Justin Timberlake...yes, I have fallen back into Justin love). Oh, and "he made a baby" is my mom's way of talking about teenage sex....way to be Mom...you make me laugh.

• I highly, highly recommend Zach Braff's blog today. Man did i laugh. It's always exciting when reading can make you laugh. And not even a chuckle, more like a burst of laughter that makes your family look at you in a weird way. His blog is one of the websites that consistently pulls a laugh out of me. Another is the Guster website. The road journal...always a good read. Where are all these funny men in real life?

• People and politics is always tricky. I do have pretty strong beliefs in this election, but i am hesitant to ever bring them up on this blog because i don't want to become one of those people constantly spouting Bush hate and Kerry hate. I did read the article in the new Rolling Stone where all the musicians get political and I did enjoy the article. I just, I like all my friends, republicans and all. Even if when put in a room with them I will vehemently argue my case, it just seems like an unfair argument if I just say, Bush lies and you're falling for it which makes you an idiot. It doesn't feel right or fair... (side note, is Rolling Stone two words or one?)

• Growing up is funky....I go to bed so early, wake up at the crack of dawn and spend most of the meantime in transit or working or sitting on the couch. I have friends who are married and could start families any day now. I have a cousin that I grew up with getting married this weekend. I don't feel old enough to do any of this...and it is technically a possibility at my age.

I don't feel like i ever get anything across right and I end up sounding so scattered and not really as intelligent as I would like.

Ah well, that's the problem with a blog...its all your perception of my words...

Title unknown..

I guess I'm a little tired and spent about 30 minutes blankly staring at the title line trying to come up with something. Sure, I was distracted by the TV, but usually the title is easy...this entry is destined to be boring.

I have one thing to bitch about and one to gush about.

Bitch: There is an obvious problem in the world that needs to be remedied. It frustrates me beyond words when I go looking for a simple thing and cannot find it because of blatant discrimination. Blatant shoe size discrimination. My foot is a size 5. In shoemaker language that means "no need to make this size because we're evil." Most of the attractive adult shoes are made in sizes 6-10. That means that even if the store would stock a size 5 (which may not be the case) the size 5 doesn't exist. As a size 5'er, you begin to know the places that do stock a size 5: the Kenneth Cole outlet, Nordstrom at the beginning of the season, etc. But sometimes, mid-season, there comes a need for a new stylish shoe. And all your hopes are dashed after a day of "smallest size is on the floor" and "I have a 6, will that do?" Argh, I hate my shoe size and that there are very few attractive shoes to put on it.

Gush: I think i got my apartment! I've already paid to take it off the market...as long as everything goes well i should be in a new, awesome, "feels just right" place in November. Bought a couch and chair today....very excited. As a side note, how completely terrifying is it to be moving out of the house for good? This is it...I'm out...I'm on my own...

By the way, for some reason, i Y Jeremy Piven. Watching Runaway Jury tonight with some lovely popcorn and a cheery countenance. Possibly doing some more coloring...

Experiments in photography...

Added those pictures mostly because I wanted to see if I could do it. Turns out I could. And now you can all see my lovely friends. Although in the interest of keeping everyone safe from stalkers that they may not have been interested in having, I will not tell you who is who.

But now...all of you that are my friends...you are famous.

And just think college girls...I was SO close to putting up a certain bachelorette party picture that involved 3 foot inflatable penises. But, in the interest of keeping those now married women in good standing with the anonymous readers of this blog, I have left out any pictures of 3 foot inflatable penises. Or is it penii? Actually, I just looked it up on dictionary.com and it can be penises or penes. You actually learned something new from my blog today, didn't you?

The high school girls... 

The college girls... 

The guilt and decisions of an adult.

First let me start by saying that i feel lots of guilt because its 7:30am and I'm at home. That's right, I'm home sick. I decided to take the plunge and be a bad employee last night when we didn't get back from Chicago until 11. Apartment hunting and dinner with the cousin lasted a little longer than expected. Woke up this morning a little earlier than I would have liked (sleeping in until 7 is not really sleeping in) with a splitting headache. So now I feel vindicated.

Plus, to be honest, there was very little to do at work. It was boring and the days were stretching to infiniti.

Anyway, I think I found the apartment I want. I've gone up and done and around again trying to reason my way through this (or out of the apartment) but I still want it. Which is probably one of the reasons I didn't sleep well and woke up with a pounding headache. Because there's reasons why each of the apartments we saw were good, and there's reasons why they aren't. And this one is seriously vintage...I mean the kitchen is a little oldish and the bathroom too. But that is not even that important (especially because there is a mini dishwasher). The apartment has this old, homey feel. Theres a fireplace (although it doesn't actually work) and my bedroom would actually be up a little spiral staircase (wood, not metal). The living room can then be looked at from the little balcony leading to the bedroom. Ok, so pretty much, its cool. And big, and not far from the EL and I'd probably buy parking in a hospital parking lot (which can only be assumed is safe). I really like it. I can't talk myself out of it.

As moving to the city gets closer, it gets scarier. I mean, I like being alone, but being all alone, all the time. Sounds lonely, right? But exciting at the same time. It's going to take some getting used to.

Swooping back to the guilt for not being at work pretending to work right now. Until my underwriter gets back there's a decided lack of things to be done at work. And everyone around the office knows it...i mean, everyone. And we all sit and look busy. Which is boring and long.

So, the headache is a little better...maybe i'll do lots of things while i'm sitting around feeling guilty.

I wonder...

what it would be like to have no ass. I was walking down Madison St. on my way to the train station, and this lady seriously cut me off. While I was fuming at her terrible walking manners, I noticed that her back, ass and thighs were all straight. There was no bump for a bum...not even a subtle one. And so, while walking to the train, I came up with a list of reasons why a butt is very important to everyday life (and mine in particular).

1. As a self-proclaimed lazy ass (if you have no butt, can you even use this term??), i sit for about 12 hours of my day. I sit at work, i sit on the train, i sit on the couch at home. And my rear has ample padding to make all this sitting more comfortable.
2. In order to keep pants on, the butt provides a convenient breaker. Without it, your pants can literally slide off of your body. I know one person, no names, that is always showing crack because she has very little butt. You know who you are...
3. For myself, I kind of like my butt. I mean, i personally think its one of my better points. And wouldn't it be sad to not get to like your butt?
4. Pockets. Ok, now this was taken straight from the bad walker. Her pants looked awkward because her pockets were all off. Apparently, with no butt, your pockets don't "fill out". I didn't know this was an issue, but after seeing her pants...it is, i promise.

That's how I fill my time walking to and from the train station. Being cut off by rude people(it must be a short girl thing) and then noticing their weirdenesses.

This is me....tired...

Yes its true, I again have referenced a truly terrible lyric/album title because these phrases just stick. But I am unusually tired. I can't be sure why, except that I honestly could not sleep because of worrying about apartment finding. Here's the problem:

I found an apartment that felt kind of right...except it cost too much. And it does have its problems. Its a little older, has a kind of crappy kitchen and no dishwasher. Also, no central air...although there is the option of putting in a window unit. The neighborhood is lovely...but it is very neighborhoodly, so I'm a little worried that at night it could be creepy (dark tree-lined, older street, pretty but could be eery). And the parking is going to be a short walk. All in all, it felt right, but is it right? So I'm going to see more apartments wednesday and then going back to that one to compare. We'll see.

Other things: for some reason I'm totally rude right now. Besides having a good friend just return from Canada and not spending loads of time with her, I've also not been returning a call I got from an old friend. I do like these people, one of them a lot (the other is an old friend that i could like a lot eventually, but old friend means i don't really know him anymore), its just so strained right now. I feel all stretched and blah. It will pass, its just the stress of making a life-changing decision.

I have to go fill out vocab words and such for insurance school. All my entries are kind of depressing eh? Just a weird time right now?

Uh...

So I couldn't think of a title for this entry. I guess I'm not feeling too witty today. Wanted to say a few things.

I'm trying out this hit counter thing (see very bottom of page). Got the idea from my sister, who gets quite a lot of hits. I can't hope to keep up. After all, I'm not in that academic/political blog category that many people out there seem to enjoy frequenting. Mine is more of a, "See what Katie is doing," for my friends and family members. Anyway, I thought it would be interesting to see how this hit counter/statistics thing works.

Wimbledon was quite a good crappy romance movie. Paul Bettany is gorgeous. Although it still does not make up for the fact that I should have been seeing Keane and big baby head. If you don't know what the hell I'm talking about with big baby head...look at this picture. See, he really does have a big baby head. And yet strangely, after seeing him onstage once, he is quite attractive. Very magnetic. His name is really Tom Chaplin..very good band, check it out.

Going to look at apartments today. If all goes well, hopefully I will be writing another post later about my favorite/soon to be new apartment.

Pumpkin carving party anyone? If you're interested, let me know.

Off to prepare to be driven to dozens of apartments.

A few points...

I'm beginning to think i should rename my blog "bullet points of Katie" or something since I constantly think like that. Honestly, half of my entries are just a collection of random thoughts. And here comes another:

• Back to the whole really skinny girl thing. Besides the fact that these girls are scary, unhealthy and not entirely attractive, a commenter of mine has classified them as easy as well. So, if all the boys are hitting on these girls because its assumed their easy, the boys aren't even giving the rest of us a chance to be easy. Maybe everyone is deep-down secretly easy and just isn't getting the chance to express it (but not me Mom and Dad, not me). My point is, these boys who only go for these girls because they know they'll get lucky...they are only creating problems in the rest of the healthy girls. Maybe all those anorexic girls only got that way from watching other anorexic girls get ass. I just feel bad for the sickly skinny girls. Who doesn't like to eat? And boys, hit on a healthy looking girl every once in a while, we're fun, i swear!

• I recently received an email asking why I had not blogged on a particular day. While I do feel like bragging about how much everyone loves my blog (just kidding, i really feel most days like people read it and laugh and think, "that Katie is one nutty girl), I do feel like I must say that most days, nothing interesting happens and therefore there is nothing to blog about. I sit around an awful lot, more than your average girl/twenty-something. I have in fact been told "no one is going to come knocking on your door, you have to get out there" more than once. Which is stupid, because I know that.

• Everyone always tells me how exciting it is to be moving to the city, and then they proceed to tell me about Lincoln Park rapists and muggings and stuff. Be happy for me, don't try to scare me out of it.

Have to go eat pizza and then go see Wimbledon.