Wednesday, November 30, 2005

As my days are mostly empty (or filled with cleaning/organizing/christmas shopping) I have tried to start preparing myself for grad school. I read over my schedule (course descriptions and all) and I felt a bit of panic. I know nothing about computers and I'm taking the following:

Java I
Analysis and Design Techniques
Data Analysis
Basic Communication Systems

I was going to post relevant and scary descriptions in here but of course, the DePaul website just went down. For a school that supposedly has one of the best computer schools around, they have a startlingly bad website. Always hanging up and NOT user friendly. Anyway, most of my panic was aimed at Data Analysis which involves calculus. Ah well, I made my bed....right?

I would like very much to make out with Matthew Fox. Too bad I'm just an ordinary girl in Chicago....I have big dreams for who I will make out with....well... never....

Monday, November 28, 2005

A letter and a question...

Dear Power Company,

If I lose my power one more time in 2005 I am going to become your worst nightmare.


Why is it so hard to find a nice pretty ornament and so easy to find ugly ones??

Saturday, November 26, 2005

And I'm off...

Thanksgiving is over. I know many people end up having drama on Thanksgiving, and this year we were, thankfully, drama-free. It was really nice. Had brunch with the Pooj (delicious) and played some Scene it, watched a movie and were late for Mom's meal (almost missed hors d'oeuvres - not terribly late). Delicious dinner (although the carver was possibly the slowest really, I've never seen a bird picked so clean before someone even got to the white meat). The grandpa, like usual, spent all of dinner making the same joke ("the food is terrible, just terrible"). And then cousins came for dessert. All in all, really nice.

I've made plans for many of my free days, although a lot of them are still happily empty. I was going to go start the Christmas shopping on Armitage tomorrow, but I fell flat on my face/knee carrying some groceries in my apartment (I should really keep my embarrassment to myself, shouldn't I?) and now my knee is all swolleny and sore. Don't know if I can handle all the walking. Not sure how I'll occupy all my time if I can't walk all over the place.

I still feel like I'll have to go to work on Monday although today feels like Sunday. Next week should be interesting.

Thursday, November 24, 2005


Clever aren't I? No, I have never eaten Tofurky. But I wouldn't mind having some Topher-cky. Watched a movie with him in it yesterday. The movie itself was not good (P.S.), but Topher was delightful.

I'm off to the suburbs to spend a day with the family. Hope you all have a great Thanksgiving...

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Free at last...

Pretty joyful. Still hasn't completely hit that I'm now "sans-job." Tomorrow I'll be dancing around the apartment. But tonight...I'm just tired from working, stressing about health insurance and other quitting things.

I don't have much to say except if you can poke fun at jesus, you should go to this site. Thanks to one of the random blogs I read for the link.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

And a head to match...

So after much reflection on the conversation I had with the VP at the bar, I realized that one of my problems with the job was lack of authority. There were so many things wrong with the business/way it was run that could be fixed with one small change/decision. But I was unable to make that decision or influence that decision. And I clearly lacked the ability to withstand being passive. I never knew how action-oriented I am, how much I want to make things work right/smoothly until it made me supremely unhappy.

What can I say about the HP was drastically cut down from the book (I mean drastically) but it still made a fairly good movie. Although this time I do think that non-book readers would have had a hard time with the plot (although it was almost entirely changed). But it was powerful and those kids are starting to be pretty good little actors. And to cap it off I heart Ron Weasley. I heart Fred and George. I even heart Mr. & Mrs and Ginny. It turns out that I am a whore for the Weasleys. But that's true in the books too.

Speaking of the books, I've decided it's time to reread them all. I finished 6 way back when and never went back to reread. And I really think I see what else I can come up with in terms of clues/foreshadowing. In terms of Time 100 I finished White Teeth (so relieved) and Slaughterhouse Five this weekend. I didn't mind Slaughterhouse Five. But I think after White Teeth I would have liked anything. So I'll keep reading at the same time as Potter. And I'll slowly get there...

Friday, November 18, 2005

I'm never gonna survive unless...

Ok, so yes I have that Seal song in my head. Or, more like I have Alanis Morissette's version of that song in my head. It doesn't really apply to what I feel like saying but I honestly cannot get that bugger out of my head.

I went out with some of my coworkers tonight. Basically the people I talk to on an everyday basis came and the good VP. I don't know if I ever mentioned him before except to dream and wish that he was the one training me. But that didn't happen and here I am escaping to school. I learned a lot tonight. And yes, I had more than one drink but did not even feel tipsy (even did a Jaeger bomb...uck). Basically I learned that the sole ethical, professional VP in the company is so worn down that he gave up years ago. I kept thinking through my "going away bash" that if only he were in charge the place would make sense! It turns out even he hates the way the place is run, realizes that most of upper management is incompetent and gave me a standing ovation for leaving.

I'll tell you a secret that he told me....when the other VP found out I was leaving she came up with ways to punish me. They didn't pan out because they were RIDICULOUS, but that just shows you the mindset of the people in charge. Petty, petty shit.
All I can say is that on Tuesday I don't think I will have a sad bone in my body. I will skip out of there.

Conversation heard near my building between teenage boy outside of car and younger teenager inside car: What time do we have to leave? What TIME? For the BRUNCH? Do you want to fight? I'll fight you....

Off to see the friend Janet tomorrow and Harry Potter! And Janet's cat!

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Yakkity yak...

Ok, so my computer is really limiting my ability to be funny and write interesting things. I had all this witty jokey stuff all mapped out in the head and then the old computer freezes. So I get frustrated and lose any intelligent blips I had except - damn you, I hate you you POS. Oh wait, this is my career choice?

And now it's moving at the speed of snails. I wouldn't be surprised if this blog gets eaten. And I have a button picture all ready to post and my picture posting program ain't working. Button a day my ass.

Hypothesis: I don't blog as much when I'm content because it's harder to be funny than it is to bitch about everything.

So I'm about 40 pages away from being done with White Teeth and I can't wait. I've read the last 200 pages really quickly because i can't WAIT to get it done. I really don't like this book. I can see what she's trying to do and that's it's supposed to be all deep and thought-provoking. But there's a problem when the thoughts it's provoking are "blah blah blah, how many more pages? science vs. religion - who cares? how many more pages?" The page countdown started at like page 100 of a 450 page book. All I can say is...thank God (if he/she/it exists, oooh, maybe the book will help me decide: NOOOOT) I can cross this book off my list tomorrow.

I came up with another button idea that doesn't require me to print things on the right kind of paper, so hopefully two this weekend when my computer decides to work again. And I should be able to get paper sometime this weekend....and then 200,349 buttons will follow.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Shock me, shock me, shock me...

Oh Empire Records....weird that I was talking about it with my sister last night and now it's on HBO. I don't know why I loved this movie....but I distinctly remember going to see it at the Geneva Theater with my 8th grade best friend and loving it. At the time I wore a bicycle chain bracelet, 800 necklaces and many plastic bracelets. I was alternative. Ah the memories...I still have that bicycle chain bracelet and I still admire it and love it. How can I wear it in public though? Maybe alterna-style will come back...

This weekend I spent probably 10 hours cleaning. The floor is clean, the bathroom, the laundry. And yet every surface still has clutter. I can hopefully fix that during my month-long sabbatical before I start school. I forgot how much I love my apartment when it's all clean and I don't view it as a chore.

The Blog O' Buttons has been officially established. Like I explain on the blog, I don't have the right kind of printing paper right now so all these buttons I have planned wouldn't look very good (the paper needs to be printer quality/glossy but NOT thick. So i'm going to have to do some research/hunt for it). And I don't want to make half-ass silly looking buttons. So "button a day" isn't a reality just yet...

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Quick update:

The button maker has arrived. And it's an awesome piece of machinery. I love it. Watch out for my newest blogging creation/sensation "Blog O' Buttons." I'm going to try to be like S and have a button a day (all made by yours truly). My plan is that if you like a button you can buy it...for $1 and a self-addressed envelope. Reasonable? If not, make a button price suggestion...oh buttons.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

I'm a big girl now...

Although it is not necessary due to the blank space that is my sex life, I got tested for every STD in the world today. Including my first HIV test. It was a little exciting. Partially because the nurse amazingly found a vein immediately (this never happens) and made the whole thing painless and partially because I'm such a responsible adult.

To Paul McCartney: did you really need to do a shameless commercial? One where they used a bunch of old footage and probably paid you a few mil? Aren't you rich enough?

And just a little advice to the stores: Yes, Christmas is good to you guys. But it isn't even Thanksgiving yet. Come on!! At least wait until the day after Thanksgiving.

As the news of my leaving has leaked (think everyone knows now) I've gotten some interesting reactions. One of the vice presidents ignored me for a day. Then the next day she told me how happy she was for me, blah-di-blah. "The bitters" congratulated me for getting out. One told me she wasn't surprised, that they had predicted it a long time ago (apparently I wasn't challenged). One has told me that now I have no excuse to pass on a drinking excursion (no, NOT dreamy computer guy..unfortunately more like, tubby dad of 3). But most have ignored the news altogether. Isn't it funny that it just shows the kind of place it is? No one talks to anyone one cares about anyone else. Not a happy place.

Oooh boy...

Was walking home in the dark today making sure no rapist was behind me (none) when I heard a rustling in some leaves. And you know, I wasn't afraid of a rapist jumping out of the bushes (which is where my sister's mind would have gone)...I was afraid of seeing a rat. I can ignore the fact that rats live in the city with me if I don't see them. If I would have seen a rat, I would have panicked. Ugh...rats, ugh.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Twiddle dee dee...

Like the sister was counseling me yesterday, quitting was better and worse than I expected. I imagined worst case scenario...yelling at me and forcing me to leave today. What really happened is that the office manager was shocked, my underwriter tried to make me feel guilty (which succeeded and nearly made me cry) and the rest of the office is still a little oblivious.

I had a nice moment with computer guy. We had some banter. I learned his work story. He was dreamy. I almost giggled like a little girl. Oh computer guy...dreamy computer guy...

I felt such relief after it was over with, that like my mooj says, it must have been the right decision. I just feel so energized today. I'm not sitting like a lump, I'm getting things done, I'm cheerful. The job was bringing me down...

Not much else to say. I'm tired from worrying most of the night last night and then nerves until about 9am....exhausting...

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Her horizon seemed to her limitless...

I have 100,000 things to say, but I thought I'd start it with a little song that I made up on my Disney trip and it goes like this... Epcot, Ooopcot, Ippy-cotty Epcot. Now that you are certain of my certifiable craziness, I'll continue with this marathon post.

First, I love Disney World. Some don't understand, but like the lady in front of us in one of the bus lines, I think I too could be the kind of person that could go to Disney 37 times (those are just the times she stayed on the campus...and she was fairly young). So I think a great time was had by all. Well, by most. Not sure about the teenage brother. If you'd like to see some pictures, I'm sure some interesting ones will come out of S's website.

As for my reading of the 100 All-Time: 14 down, 86 to go. Lord of the I liked Animal Farm. And my title can be attributed to my current read: To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf. I'm having a rough time with the floweriness of the writing. But I'm more than halfway through and am sure I can struggle through the rest.

On to my new life plan: computers. I am officially going to grad school (undecided as to what kind of thing I will be doing with computers) starting January 3, 2006. Because I cannot handle/hate being dishonest, I am officially quitting my job tomorrow. I have some relief at the prospect that I don't have to deal with these people anymore. But I also have a touch of terror at the idea of actually physically quitting. I just cannot predict what will happen. I think the best is if I would be yelled at - in this scenario I cannot imagine crying. I'm just afraid I'll get so nervous as to cry. I feel like these next few days are going to be crazy busy.

I have to go prepare for tomorrow....