Monday, January 30, 2006

Growing....sideways....

No, I am not getting fat.

You know, I have recently been wondering about how I compare to my peers. And I know I should measure my success by my own standards...but I don't have any standards. Like my sister said...I can't figure out what my measures for accomplishment are. I mean, I want to say something about being happy. But it is so vague to measure success through happiness. And like she says, love. I guess there are no concrete ideas of how to compare myself to others my age, or to compare myself to the place I wish I was. Especially since I don't know where I wish I was. How confusing...

Someone on TV (I should be ashamed, but it was Celebrity Fit Club) said that their mother didn't have the "mothering gene." I found myself debating in my head what this gene is, if it's even fair to say there is one. I came to no conclusions except that I do think I have the gene. But saying I have the gene doesn't mean I want to use it. So I guess that makes me believe that it isn't a gene (because you can't deny a gene)...but a disposition?

Ah shit, this doesn't make any sense. One of those posts where I have to wonder if I should just scrap it. But I won't. Just goes to show that I rarely ever come to any conclusions about anything...

1 comment:

  1. I am going to send you the same quotations I sent to your sister and relate the same things to you. ...Success is not something you have to measure against your peers. It's not a race or a contest with an end. It's an attitude; an understanding of what is really important to you. As I said to A, You are a shining star in my life. What you DO or don't DO with a career or in endeavors that matter to others is insignificant. Those that truly matter and truly know will not foist their measures of success on you. If they try, tell them to fuck off.

    Here are the quotes.

    If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded."
    -Maya Angelou

    If your success is not on your own terms, if it looks good to the world but does not feel good in your heart, it is not success at all.
    Anna Quindlen
    (1953 - )

    Of course there is no formula for success except perhaps an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.
    Arthur Rubinstein
    US (Polish-born) composer & pianist (1886 - 1982)

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