For lack of anything better to do I'm blogging again. To be honest, my stomach really feels gross and I'm really tired, so I'm not motivated to do much or I could spend my day doing something fun.

I had a really un-settling dream last night and just thinking about it makes me a little upset. The dream itself was actually a really good one, not a nightmare or anything. But it was about one of my oldest guy friends and this actually happens every now and again, I just miss him fiercely. Not like the ache of a lost friend (although I have that for others) but the longing of something great that just got lost. There are a lot of lost guy friends (and girls too) in my past, so some of you are probably thinking of one person and some another, but I think you would all be surprised at who I miss the most. My sister has talked about lost friends often and I pretty much always agree with her. Sure it's not as sharp of a loss as a "lover" but I think it's just as long of a grieving process. And all of my past friends (and of course present) I loved completely. I'm not one to go half assed, which is probably why I have a lot of lost friends (because once it became a half-assed struggle I quit).

Anyway, I don't know why the dream was so hard or why it's stuck. He and I were far too different to stay friends and I don't even know what I'd say if I saw him tomorrow. I'm sure he probably doesn't even wonder about me. I guess I just have a hard time letting go.